Monday, April 12, 2004
Grief, sleeping, waking, mom
I wouldn't wish the grief of loosing a parent on anyone. It's madness.
In Wisconsin, in mom's home, sleep brought me relief from the pain. While sleeping the weight of it could lift. Now here at home in Flagstaff the waking state is where I find relief. When I sleep my dreams are filled with mourning. Today's waking dream was about gathering mom's things together.
You know how unconditional joy is a place in my beingness where when my consciousness dwells there, that my emotions are flooded with joy? Well, grief is like that too. Sure, it may be a lower, unilluminated state, existing in human conditionality, however, it does exist, fully developed as what I hope is a pond and not a river of unquenchable grief.
In Wisconsin, in mom's home, sleep brought me relief from the pain. While sleeping the weight of it could lift. Now here at home in Flagstaff the waking state is where I find relief. When I sleep my dreams are filled with mourning. Today's waking dream was about gathering mom's things together.
You know how unconditional joy is a place in my beingness where when my consciousness dwells there, that my emotions are flooded with joy? Well, grief is like that too. Sure, it may be a lower, unilluminated state, existing in human conditionality, however, it does exist, fully developed as what I hope is a pond and not a river of unquenchable grief.
